Hello, Dear One,

It may not seem this way now, but you will learn to appreciate your life’s journey as you do an expansive, many-coursed meal. Each course will provide you with lessons, although some will be more pleasing to your palate than others.

The first course is naturally where you begin. You are taking things in and getting to know yourself. Here, you might learn that politeness, deference, and gratitude are agreeable flavors that adults seem to enjoy. You learn to appreciate these flavors, too, because the sweetness of your compliance begets lollipops of approval. You might initially enjoy yourself, but here you will not broaden your taste. It won’t be until you nearly clear your plate that you become aware that things are missing. The absent flavors will add to the richness and depth of your experiences, but you haven’t yet met them. At this point, you’re just devouring the syrup, but after a while, you’ll become aware that this much sugar can’t be good for you.  

Your next course has heat. You will begin to experience the bite of life, and its pain that lingers almost unbearably at times. You will try to extinguish the fire of rejection and disappointment with people-pleasing and caretaking. You might even get burned by the intensity of your own nervous system. However, you will also learn that when tempered, heat provides warmth, and can complement your sweetness. Other times, it will be so sweltering that you shed your layers fast and haphazardly, such that the mess you’ve created might obstruct and hurt others. You have to be careful with this heat, dear one. 

Your third course is layered. Here, you’ll learn how the flavors of your life need to meld. At times, this will command you to sit still as your uncertainty marinates, without trying to smother the heat of your nervous system into a bland numbness. You will also appreciate sweetness most when it accompanies the saltiness of your tears, balancing the honey and brine of your emotions and your life. You’ll notice the umami of community and how it wraps its arms around you with its depth, comfort, and fullness, and see that the measured, deliberate addition of heat only further enhances each note. 

There will be more courses to come, but for now, allow this meal to settle. After all, you need time to digest your life thus far, and to incorporate what you have learned from each flavor. It takes time to develop recipes to your palate and to your health. Occasionally, you’ll still add too much salt, sugar, or heat. But that’s okay, because soon enough, you’ll be creating your own meal and sharing your table with others.